Something's Wrong When You Regret Things That Haven't Happened Yet
by shadowboxing
Summary: Insane isn't really black or white we are all pathological, in our own ways.


Molly Hooper washed her hands thoroughly. She watched the water run down her hands for several minutes. Although her eyes were trained on her hands, her thoughts were elsewhere. A sudden hand on her shoulder brought a small gasp to her lips. Molly whirled around flinging the water droplets in the process. A short woman grunted as the beads of water slid slowly down her face. "Yes, erm, can I, uh, help you miss?" The woman smiled faintly and brought her hand up to whip the water away. "Oh dear, I am so sorry miss." Molly stuttered as she snatched a towel off the counter in hopes to aid the lady. Instead Molly whipped the towel in the woman's face, causing her to let out a cry of surprise and pain.

"Miss Hooper I am looking for a body." Molly cringed inwardly at the woman's thick New York, American accent.

"Can I see some identification please?"

"How do you think I got up to this level?" The woman raised an eyebrow,

"Well I would like to see it to formally identify yourself."

The woman took out her wallet from her back pocket. Molly took it from her and flipped the Velcro open. Inside one flap was a gold badge with a small eagle at the top and with CIA written underneath with a collection of words inscribed in blue. On the other flap was an ID card with all of her important identification information. Molly sighed and handed the wallet back.

"So what brings a CIA agent like yourself to London?"

"I'm looking for an old friend."

"And who might that be Miss Blair?"

"William Dae Reign."

Molly nodded and went to the record books. She flipped through a few but her results were inconclusive. She looked up at Miss Blair and shook her head slowly,

"I'm sorry but there doesn't seem to be a man by that name would you like to check the unidentified bodies?" The woman nodded glumly. After an hour of looking over pale lifeless bodies Miss Blair sat in the chair by the window making a few phone calls.

Molly stared at her paperwork while trying to eavesdrop on Miss Blair's conversations.

"No, sir. Yes I have checked all of the morgues. No I don't think so. I will ask if you wish. Yes sir."

Miss Blair walked out of the morgue. Molly watched the woman closely before continuing her work.

~TIME JUMP~

"Thank you for the flat. I will rarely be here so you don't need to worry about the noise from me."

"Oh don't worry about it dearie. I miss a bit of noise. Ever since one of my boys went up and flown from the coop it seems so much duller around here." The woman named Mrs. Hudson stated glumly,

"Well if you want to come along I am going out to dinner in five minutes." Miss Blair said hoping to cheer up the old woman.

"And so I pull your head out of your arse it's not a hat."

The CIA laughed heartily and wiped away tears. She began picking at her food as the conversation seemed to come to a silent halt.

"Why did you move to England? How long have you lived in where ever you are from?"

"I moved here because I am looking for an old partner of mine. I am from New York. I lived there for all my life. My parents died a little while ago in a car crash so after that I lived in Florida for a month and then was assigned in London."

"I used to live in Florida with my husband." Mrs. Hudson exclaimed,

"Why did you live in Florida?" Miss Blair asked,

"My husband ran a local business there but he passed away a long while ago. I came back and started renting my flats out as a favor to a friend. Speaking of which you will have to meet him next time we are all at the flat. He is a lovely man a bit blunt though. Oh look at the time I need to go my sister is going to land at the airport soon." Mrs. Hudson said a few more goodbyes as she left the small cafe. Miss Blair paid the bill and went back to her flat.

~TIME JUMP~

She stood in the entrance and eyed all the boxes carefully. She had one wall lined with boxes filled with clothing. On another was books and knickknacks. In the kitchen she had all of her necessary items. She sighed and put her head in her hands.

"Those stupid movers." Miss Blair exited her flat and went to Mrs. Hudson's door. She knocked for a few minutes but no one answered. However someone else from upstairs answered.

"Would you cease with all that infernal banging I am trying to think."

"Oh I am sorry I was just looking for Mrs. Hudson." Miss Blair apologized,

"Dear god you're American, no one you are so stupid."

"Wow, thanks jack ass."

"Look you simpleton," he didn't get a chance to finish what he was saying because the short woman jumped up the stairs and knocked him down on his butt. The man felt a flash of something other than pain course through his veins as he

Stared open mouthed at the glaring woman.

"No you look. I haven't even lived here one whole day and I am already getting bullied by my neighbors. Now I have to figure what to do with all my crap and then find a place to sleep while I paint my flat. So I would appreciate it if you would just shut up." The woman held her hand out to the man sitting in front of her. He took her hand and was impressed by the amount of strength she contained to pull him up on his feet.

"I sincerely apologize. I had no idea. I would like to assist you in your endeavor to move in comfortably. My name is Sherlock Holmes."

"I am Anna Blair. Thank you for apologizing I would indeed appreciate your help."

They both went down to her flat and they moved every box to the middle of the room. Anna looked at Sherlock who was carefully setting a box down.

"I need to change so I can paint. If you want you could help me but if it's getting too late you're good. I am glad you could help me."

"I will paint. Excuse me, I will return once I've changed." With that Sherlock exited Anna's flat to change. When he returned Anna was in a pair of short metallic purple running shorts and a tight low V white running shirt. He could see her bra from underneath the thin material. He cleared his throat and she looked up and smiled softly. Anna handed him a paint brush and told him to paint the living room. He nodded hesitantly and stepped onto the painter's tarp. He dipped his brush into the light blue color he began painting. Anna went into the kitchen and started painting the walls the same color. When her pan of paint ran out she went back into the living room. Anna stared at Sherlock he had absolutely no idea what he was doing. She went over to him and took his hand. He froze up as she guided his wrist in the proper direction. He nodded his head in thanks and re-painted the wall. Sherlock could still feel the ghost feel of her hand. It was soft but had a certain texture to it that said she had much experience in her career. She wasn't a doctor or a dancer her nails were too long. She did have the grip and posture of a gun man. Her knuckles had a faint callus so she was a fighter. Either a personal trainer or someone who was in the military. Her smell lingered as well. A light strawberry and cocoa smell. Sherlock inhaled again and smirked.

After they painted the flat, Anna and Sherlock went up to his flat. Sherlock sat at the table across from Anna. He studied her and then brought back some clothing.

"What are these for?"

"You will not be living in your flat for at least another week. You need to finish painting and setting up your home. You have been in hotels for at least a month and you have run out of clothing. I have just given you a T-shirt and boxers. I assure you they are quite clean. I think it would suit you better than those dirty, painty exercising clothes. Since we have become acquainted I find it acceptable to lend you some clothe to sleep in. Since you won't be returning to work until next week. Now would you prefer to shower or stay in that state?"

"Um thanks I think I will shower." Sherlock directed her to the shower and watched her walk away. When the door locked he got up and went into down stairs and into Anna's flat. He took her phone and entered his number into it and sent a text to himself. Sherlock winced when his phone moaned to alert a new text. He set her phone down and went into her freshly painted grey room. He studied the insides of Anna's opened boxes. Sherlock nodded to himself and went back to his flat.

Anna examined Sherlock's bathroom before stepping in the shower. As she began scraping the paint off her legs she heard her bathroom door open.

"Sherlock please get out of the bathroom."

"How is it that a young woman such as your self can trust a male stranger so easily? What if I were to take advantage of you? You could have been defenseless. However I know that isn't the case. Had you been normal you wouldn't have invited me into your home let alone shower in my flat."

"Maybe I trust people easily." Anna protested,

"Maybe but I know that you don't trust people easily because of the reminder on your chest."

"I don't know what you're,'' she was cut off when Sherlock pulled back the shower curtain. Anna stood naked and facing Sherlock. He pointed to her chest, revealing a large purple scar starting from her chin running down her chest to her thigh like a snake. Anna stared flabbergasted at Sherlock.

"Your make up might hide it from everyone but I could see right through it the moment you knocked me down." Anna's hand shot out so fast Sherlock didn't have time to react. The slap rang through the flat. Sherlock watched Anna wrap her arms around her chest and turn to face away from Sherlock.

"You bastard, you have no right." Anna could feel her anger dissipating when she heard Sherlock's temper rising.

"Oh I don't? I think I do considering you have been paid by my brother to watch me. You have been paid a considerable amount just to live down stairs and report my every move. You are a despicable woman. Spying on a man just to get paid. You slut. I am ashamed to allow you into my home."

"You're wrong. But I am sorry." Anna stepped out of the shower and tried to grab a towel but Sherlock gripped it tight.

"What do you mean I am wrong?"

"I am getting paid but not in money or sex. My brother went missing a few months ago. Your brother offered to help find him, if I kept an eye on you. I am not spying, I am protecting you from men like Moriarty. Since John and Mary are on their honeymoon I am staying to protect you. Mr. Holmes has instructed that I keep you safe and in line. If I don't appear to trust you then how will you trust me? I am not trying to spy or hurt you. I am sorry. Please hand me the towel and I will leave."

Sherlock raised the towel up and wrapped it around Anna. He tucked the ends together and gazed down at the floor in embarrassment.

"Don't go. I am sorry for making false accusations. I insist you stay while you prepare your flat. I have a spare bedroom on the other side of this bathroom."

Anna smiled faintly and went into the said bedroom. She dressed promptly and returned to the kitchen.

"I served the military for a bit and was recruited to work with a few programs that did international missions. I did body guarding for a little bit and have obviously returned to it."

"Tell me about this brother you lost." Sherlock mumbled as he drank tea from his chair in the living room.

Anna got a cup and sat across from him in a red chair.

"He came to London on a case but after a few death threats from an unknown person my brother disappeared and we haven't heard from him since. We didn't have the resources to find him so he was presumed dead. I came to locate his body."

"I am sorry for your lost. Have you talked to Lestrade?"

"Who?" Anna asked slowly,

"Never mind that. Why don't I show you to your temporary room?"

~TIME JUMP~

Anna walked into her finished bedroom. She unpacked her boxes and stared at her possessions. After moving from America Anna had given up most of her things. Now all she had now was a photo album, a snow globe, a stuffed toy bison, a stack of posters and a journal. Anna flipped through the half empty book and smiled as she began writing about her new home. Once she heard her flat door open she hid the journal under her pillow and she sat on the floor.

"Anna I was wondering when you will be reporting to my brother?"

Anna stood up and smiled at Sherlock,

"I don't know, he said to report whenever I felt you were acting suspicious or that someone has compromised your safety."

"I see. Well I also came down here to see if you needed help unpacking."

"Don't you have a case you need to solve?"

"Since John has not been here to amuse me I have been terribly bored. There has not been a case in over two weeks. That is why I have come to offer my assistance."

"Oh, sure. I uh, well I am just unpacking so if you just want to talk that would work too. I don't need muscle until I finish." Sherlock nodded at Anna and sat on her bed. "I hear you are good at deductions. Why don't you do some on me?"

"You are in your mid-twenties. You are familiar with the gun and with fighting. Your military service includes the CIA, Marine Corps, and secret service. Very impressive for a woman as young as yourself. You started out in the marines and recruited after your injury into the secret service. Once you turned twenty three you went into the CIA and when your brothers position became compromised you went on to work for the local police department in New York City. The movie _the Bourne identity_ is the amount of training you went through. You are basically the reincarnation of that character. I assume my brother has been watching you closely since you began to work for the government. He must have been the one to help with your transfers and role of employment."

"Now explain how you figured all that out."

"When I saw you in the shower I saw how fit you are, you walk with great posture and you have no wrinkles. That means you are fairly young but old enough to be in the military. Your hands are very steady and even though you are angry, you don't lash out but use enough force to take hold of a situation. You stand in a position that suggests you are always ready whether it be running or defending yourself. You first worked with the Marine Corps because of the tattoo and little possessions. Your tattoo is and anchor with the phrase 'Semper Fidelis' wrapped around it. The phrase and symbol are both well know to stand for that branch of military in America. Your team must have been captured and,"

"That's enough I believe you got everything correct. The only thing you didn't get was I never went back to New York. I came to London by request of my old general. He told me about Mycroft and I've been in London since."

"Yes, well I'm sorry. You will have to tell me about your military days another time. I would like to know if my theory is correct."

"Yes perhaps. Now if you could follow me I need you to help me to pick out furniture for my flat." Anna stood up and brushed her dress out and grabbed her wallet. Sherlock stood up and started following her until he noticed a little black book hiding under the bed. Sherlock picked it up and shoved into his pocket.

~TIME JUMP~

"I like the blue one. What do you think?"

"I prefer the grey one." Sherlock muttered, Anna turned around to face him. She stepped back noticing that Sherlock had been standing very closely behind her.

"The grey one it is. And the price is, holy crap that is expensive. Okey let's look over there at the clearance section. Oh that's nice. It won't match my walls but we can repaint I guess."

Sherlock followed Anna around the store as she pointed to things she liked and to the things she could afford. Sherlock would make a few remarks every time she would ask his opinion. As the two hours bore on Sherlock started deducing the people in the store. Eventually he heard Anna giggle.

"Why are you making that sound?" Sherlock scowled at Anna.

"What you said about that woman was funny."

"What?" Anna looked at Sherlock and noticed that he had thought she was laughing at him.

"You are amusing me Sherlock. You are funny. I enjoy hearing words leave your mouth."

"Yes, yes, I get the point you are making. Are we done here I am becoming bored with your insolent talking."

Anna snatched his hand instantly. To an on viewer it would appear they were holding hands. What the viewer did not see was that Anna dug her nails into his hand so hard she had caused small droplets of blood to form at the top of his skin.

"We mustn't say disrespectful things." Anna hissed through her false smile. Sherlock frowned to convince Anna her that her lesson was received. However on the inside Sherlock writhed in delight. He wanted nothing more than her to raise his pale hand and lap up her cruelty. He inwardly rejoiced in pleasure hoping she would continue to punish him. Alas she stepped away.

"Let's just go. I will come back and buy it when I get my first paycheck."

~TIME JUMP~

Sherlock sat in his chair and opened the little black book that he had taken from Anna's apartment. The cover was well worn showing she has treasured it had water marks all over the cover and it appeared bent folded many times so that the pages remained crinkled no matter what he did to smooth them out.

He flipped the book open and looked at each date. It dated back to when she could be no more than sixteen. He noticed there was a very large time gap in her dates. He looked at the one before the time gap.

_Today we had to be debriefed on what is to be done. I have already been to this debriefing twelve times. I do indeed think they have this layout drilled into our brains. I leave tomorrow and I will admit I am pretty nervous. I am literally the only girl going with the group. The general told me he knew I had potential since the very beginning. The mission requires that we go disband some pirates. Every time I think of these men I imagine real 'yo ho matey' pirate with the parrot on the shoulder and the hook for a hand. Then I am reminded that these are horrible men. They steal and kill and are not the same as the ones told in the peter pan tale. I will hopefully be back in a week. I am excited that a certain superior will be going. He is to be reviewing how I do and if I should be promoted. He may be my superior and ten years older but he is so attractive. I know he has a thing for me. I mean he works out with me and I catch him checking me out all the time. Today he sat with me during lunch and kept flirting with me..._

Sherlock rolled his eyes as he skimmed over the rest of the entrance which only contained more gossip about her friend. He flipped past the few empty pages that were crinkled the most. He noticed that the next few entrances were written very sloppily as if she was angry.

_I don't think this is necessary at all. That stupid cow of a therapist is making me do this. If I don't she will submit me into the mental rehabilitation building which is another name for the nut house. I wish she would just let me draw pictures or describe ink blots. The woman wants me to write down what happened all those months but I can't. It is too painful. She doesn't understand what happened. I am the only one. I can't just be expected to smile and wave to the camera saying everything is alright. I don't even want that damn award from the president. Promoting me won't help anything. I just want to leave. I want to leave this planet. I don't want to be here anymore. _

"Sherlock have you seen a small little black book. I figured I could use your deduction skills to find it." Sherlock looked up at Anna and frowned. She hasn't seen him tuck the book into his jacket.

"I can help you find it if you want." Sherlock got up and followed Sherlock back to her flat. He watched her look around the room and smirked when she crawled on her hands and knees causing the dress to rise up showing off some of her rear end.

"Well do you see anything?" Anna asked hopefully,

"I will try to recount what happened earlier." Sherlock put his hands to his temple and scrunched his eyes shut. Anna watched his head jerk back and forth as he searched in his inner thoughts.

Sherlock replayed the events of him taking her book in his head. He then noticed something different the third time he replayed the scenes. Anna had indeed walked away but her vision had never left him. There was a mirror in the hallway to the stairs. She had seen him take her book. Or had she really?

"No I did not see your book. Could I buy you a new one to compensate for your loss?"

"No its fine it will turn up eventually. Why don't we go get dinner and you can tell me all about yourself. Maybe I won't already know it." Anna joked as she grabbed her coat and they headed into a cab.

"I suppose I will see you tomorrow." Sherlock muttered as he opened Anna's door for her. Anna suddenly hugged Sherlock. To his surprise he found himself enjoying every moment of it. He put his arms around her small back to embrace her further. As fast as the moment began it ended just as briefly. Anna smile slowly drifted to a flat line. Sherlock studied her body language until a loud smack rang out. Anna had slapped him with her journal. Sherlock felt foolish for not noticing her taking it from his pockets.

"Damn. I didn't mean to take it and not tell you. I just,"

"Thank you for dinner it was lovely. I will see you later. Don't touch my stuff." Anna huffed the last but and closed the door.

~TIME JUMP~

Anna went into her bedroom and pulled out the file on Sherlock Holmes. Behind one of the folder flaps she took out a key. Taking the key she went outside of her building. She glanced slightly up and saw Sherlock watching her. Anna smirked and went down the road. Taking a few unnecessary turns she eventually found herself at an abandoned warehouse. She put the key in the lock and went inside. Anna turned on the lights and got inside the elevator. Going up a few stories she got off at the roof. Anna went outside and blinked a few times to adjust her eyes to the bright light of the fading sun. The peach sky only allowed Anna to see the silhouette of a man.

"Good evening Miss Blair, how do you fair?"

"Quite well. How are you Mr. Holmes?"

"I have seen better days. Now it has been a week since you moved in. How are you and my brother doing?"

"He knows that you pay me to watch him. He said he would allow it. Sherlock has gotten a bit too snoopy for my liking. But I suppose he would have figured it out eventually. When will Mr. Watson be returning?"

"On Monday. It would explain why Sherlock is on edge. He doesn't want to disappoint his dear friend. Now I will need you to come up with a better cover story for Watson, Sherlock can be the only one to know of the extent of danger Sherlock is actually in." Mycroft stated blandly.

"I understand completely sir."

"I do not have any news on your brother I will personally continue to look into the matter. I understand that you start your job on Tuesday."

"Yes I am really excited to manage it."

"Yes, well you do know since you will be doing that during the day you will watch my brother any other time you are free."

"Of course sir. I do have monitoring methods while I am away. Even if I don't have the means, Mr. Watson will be there."

"Quite right. Well I always do enjoy these chats. I suppose I will see you next week."

"Indeed, sir."

~TIME JUMP~

"So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, 'Dear God! What is that thing,' will echo in your perfect ears. That is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever."

Anna paused the movie and went into the bathroom. When Anna came out she found a tall man sitting on her blanket. He stared at the TV. with interest.

"Hello Ashton, how did you get in?" Anna leaned against the doorway with her arms folded on her chest.

"I have my ways. Tell me, how have you been lately?"

"Terrific. How did you know where I went?"

"Same way I got in. I have ways. New job any good?"

"I suppose I start tomorrow."

"I'm not talking about that job."

Ashton stood up and turned to face Anna without stretched arms. He smiled and went to hug her but Anna shrugged away.

"How do you know about that? Let me guess you have your ways. Don't touch me." Anna pushed the man as he tried to embrace her again.

"Why are you acting so distant? Didn't you miss me? It hasn't been that long has it?"

"Get out of here right now before someone sees you." Anna continued to back away from him until he had cornered her in her bathroom.

"Anna tsk, tsk, you should be better at watching your surroundings."

Ashton put his hand on Anna's waist and pulled her into his chest. Anna held her breath as he placed his other hand on her waist.

"Let go of me now, damn Ash please?" Ashton leaned in and whispered over her mouth.

"I didn't like that you took off like that. People talk." He leaned closer and bright his lips to hover over Anna's. She closed her eyes waiting for a kiss but instead he brought his tongue from her chin and up to her nose. Anna flinched at the wet spit resting on her face.

"I love you Anna you are mine. You should have never left." Ashton's grip tightened and caused Anna to cry out. "I don't understand why are you watching that man? Do you love him now?"

"No I swear I don't."

"Don't lie to me Anna." Ashton snarled through his teeth.

"Anna are you okay I heard someone talking to you." Mrs. Hudson's voice echoed through Anna's flat. Ashton let Anna go and frowned.

"Tell her everything is fine, you called your friend and I will return next week." With that Ashton let Anna walk upstairs to meet Mrs. Hudson.

* * *

**Hello I am posting this because awhile back I deleted all of my stories and so this is my new project. I hope to complete this story in a reasonable amount of time and with frequent updates. However due to school starting up again I am not promising anything.**

**A note about the story. I have not been in the army so anything that does not seem factually correct I apologize. However this is purely fictional so if it upsets you suck it up. Sometimes I can't be a know it all. And if there is anything else that is not agreeable to you well I give the same advice.**

**I probably won't be doing these little author notes often. Buy a lovely reminder to review, follow, favorite and all that jazz. NO FLAMES. It's just rude.**

**Disclaimer- Nothing that resembles the work of Arthur Conan Doyle is mine it belongs to that man and the people at BBC. If it looks a bit not like theirs then it is mine. **


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